My understanding of my own leadership capacity has morphed into a better understanding of my drawbacks and strengths. Going into my first Leadership 101 class, I had a very clear idea about how I would choose to lead: I prefer to think logically, realistically, and think about what would be better for the group as a whole. Initially I went in thinking I would develop a strong sense of  camaraderie with everyone I would work with, that I would not be afraid to speak my mind, for fear of rocking the boat, and that I would make frequent contributions reminiscent of back seat driving. While this all proved to be true in a way, I was challenged and met with a little more resistance then I was used to. I was met with a class of people who admittedly, had very similar ideas to me, but had different takes on what that meant. I also had the privilege to talk to and work with others who were different enough to challenge my own ways of thinking and planning. I do believe I went in knowing how I prefered to lead, and how I preferred to work with others, but I also believe I came in knowing that my style of leading was in need of some experience.

Before my classes in college, I was often someone people could turn to; I was in the top 10% of my class, I was willing to speak-up, present and make speeches, and there was always something I could add to make things work. Projects, assignments, jokes, a conversation, I always looked to bring more, and in this class I found there were ways to recieve. My peers thought like me, we had similar trains of thought and conclusions, but there were also many twists and tunnels that always made sure we stood out from one another. In class we could be given something, anything, and be told to read, analyze, and discuss. I felt like the discussion would be mediocre at best, imagine my delight when someone would point out a heart-wrenching quote about animal cruelty and make me think about it in terms of people, or when a someone on a different occasion pointed out in an Op-ed that the writer was passive and looking for attention. Conversation pieces that I couldn’t fathom coming up.

Additionally, I found that working in a group the way I tend to might not always work. In a class where everyone is expected to be a leader, there are about to be some issues and complications because everyone is taught to lead their groups into battle. I prefer to either lead by steering the group into what i believe is the right way for us to move, or to be the head of the whole operation because I’m a big sister and some of my best friends from high school were underclassmen who didn’t want to work half the time. It’s different, as class groups taught me that I needed to present myself as an equal, no herder, and no boss. In order to make a turn in a group affair, of to even make a compromise, I needed to be strong and flexible in order to make things work. This class had taught me manything about how my leadership skills need to evolve and hopefully this is still the edge of an iceberg.